Touch It
by coffee4106
Summary: Touch it. That's all Tony wants the crew to do. What is IT? What is he up to? Theres never a reason for Tony to want someone to touch something without him benefiting... right? Read and see what IT is...


**Touch It**

_So I was at work writing away when I realized.. I had no clue what it was that needed touched… HAHA.. ya, it came along. There won't be updates to this story, just more stories added as I get ideas. This just seemed like a scene that would be on NCIS. I did steal a couple lines from the show itself though as well as the characters. But I don't own anything and wrote this strictly for fun and laughter. This is going to my dear friend Linda in Washington cause she's always trying to keep us on topic in ATC! CHEERS to you Linda. BACK TO TOPIC!_

"Touch it."

"No Tony, I am not going to touch it." Ziva said as her fist hit Tony's shoulder

"Ah, OUUUCH. Jeesh Ziva." Tony whined.

"Don't be such a girl Tony." McGee said as he joined them in front of Tony's desk.

"She hit me."

"That was a tap Tony, do you want me to show you what happens when I hit you?" Ziva smiled as Tony shook his head no.

"Touch it." Tony quickly focused the conversation back to the object in question.

"What is it?" McGee asked, curious as to why Tony wanted everyone to touch it.

"What's what?" Abby asked as she came to a sudden hault at the desk. "Whoa, that's freaky Tony. What is that?"

"Thank you Abby," Tony beamed with pride and glanced around the growing crowd. "Wanna touch it?"

"No, I'm thinking I should be afraid." Abby said as she turned her head in different directions looking at the object.

"Has Gibbs seen this yet?" Ziva asked

"Yuppers.' Tony was still beaming causing all three to be overly suspicious.

"And?" McGee asked

"And what?" Tony questioned while glancing back at the desk.

"TONY." Ziva yelled.

"Touch it ZEEVAH." He smiled at her.

"What does it do Tony?" Abby asked after seeing the death glare from Ziva to Tony.

"Touch it and find out." Tony pointed his finger around the group. "The Director touched it."

"She did not." Ziva challenged.

"She did so. Why do you question me?" Tony acted hurt and placed his hand on his chest.

Ziva wrinkled her face up at Tony and shook her head. Tony smiled and walked around the desk to stand behind her. She eyed him suspiciously as he came near her. She stood her ground, ready to take him on at the first move.

He leaned close to her ear. "Trust me Ziva. I'll even let you open it.'

Ziva let out a snort laugh and turned her head to face the knucklehead trying to tempt her. "No Tony, for the last time. NO."

"Really Ziva, I'm ashamed to say I know you." He stepped back as the three turned around to face him. "You, you know, being a trained assassin and all. You are afraid of one simple little object." He crossed his arms across his chest and nodded his head up and down.

"I am not afraid of it Tony, but one must question this situation." She decided to turn the tables on him. She walked up to him and leaned into him, rising on her tiptoes to come even with his face. "Why do you want me to touch it?" She was tempting him.

"HAHA Ziva, you're trying to defer the main theory here. BACK TO TOPIC WOMAN. Touch it." Tony was laughing as Ziva was smiling at him.

Still standing up to Tony and being as close as possible without touching, Ziva glanced toward Abby. "Can you tell what it is without TOUCHING it Abby?"

Tony was smiling now, with his face mere inches from Ziva's face. Her skin so soft, her eyes so dark, and the body lotion she wore. The thoughts that were running through his head at that moment. Page 57, page 62, page 101.

"Uh…. Hi Gibbs." Abby smiled and waived.

Both Tony and Ziva went to turn their heads to where Abby was looking but when they came face to face with each other, Gibbs hands smacked the backs of their heads at the same time. Tony's head lurched forward as did Ziva's, causing them to bump heads.

"Oweeeeeee." Ziva pushed Tony away and grabbed her head.

At exactly the same time Tony tried to speak, "Boss…." But was violently shoved backwards by an assassin, stopping suddenly when he came in contact with Ziva's desk. He didn't have time to thank the desk before he lost his balance and toppled over the desk, feet flying over his head, to the hard ground below. The chair tried to stop his fall but managed to just get tangled with his legs instead.

"Ziva, are you ok? Oh Tony." Abby ran from one to the other trying to help.

"You went to her first Abbs, get this chair off me, CRAP. Ziva." Tony wanted to yell.

Gibbs had made it to his desk in time to watch the show and now sat smiling at his crew. Tony on the ground, Abby trying to save the day, Ziva cursing in one of her million languages and McGee. Awe McGee. Hes the smart one. He had smoothly and quietly walked back to his desk and sat punching away diligently at his computer, pretending this was a normal day in the office. A movement above them caught his eye and he glanced up to see the Director watching from above. She shook her head and pointed at the commotion. Gibbs shrugged his shoulders and smiled.

"ZeeeeVAH.." Tony drug her name out as he finally stood up and brushed himself off.

"What?" Ziva asked overly annoyed with him.

"What was that?"

"You hit me in the head Tony."

"Rephrase that please. GIBBS hit US in the head." Tony answered while frowning at a smiling Gibbs.

"Its your fault Tony." Ziva pointed her finger into Tony's chest.

"Mine, why mine? You were the one standing too close to me." He answered.

Ziva rattled off another string of foreign words and flung her hands in the air causing Gibbs to laugh.

"Stop it. That's not Spanish or Italian. I don't know what you're saying. What are you saying Ziva?"

"Trust me Tony, you don't want to know what it is that I am saying."

Tony walked over to Ziva and took her hand away from the small red mark on her head. "Its fine, you're fine. You look fine, its nothing."

"Get out of my space Tony." Ziva demanded.

"Space, face. That could be spoken different ways. Get out of my space, or do you mean get out of my face?" Tony knew he was getting on her nerves even more than usual.

"What's the difference?" Ziva glared.

"Well, a lot actually, if you think about it." He smiled and winked at her causing her blood to reach boiling point.

"Not really Tony, cause space your in, face, well you're in that too. So…" Abby started to explain.

"Thank you Abby." Tony glanced over at Abby as she moved to stand behind Gibbs.

"You're welcome Tony." She crossed her arms.

"Don't hide behind me; I'm not going to protect you." Gibbs said as he leaned to the side to look at Abby.

"You wouldn't protect me?" Abby whined.

"From Ziva or Tony?" Gibbs asked.

"Either." Abby was worried now and frowned at Gibbs.

"Tony, yes. Ziva, no."

"Gibbs." Abby cried

Tony was still smiling at Ziva as she contemplated taking him down or pushing him again. Either would work.

"Page…" Tony started.

"Shut up Tony." Ziva demanded causing Tony to frown at her and back away.

"Ziva is a trained assassin Abby." Gibbs was still watching Tony and Ziva with their stand off.

"So, you are afraid of Ziva." Abby pointed out.

"No, I'm not afraid of Ziva."

"But.."

"Why are you still standing here Tony?" Ziva asked rudely.

"Because it's MY desk Ziva." He answered right back.

"Gibbs…" Abby cried.

"Whaaaat Abs?"

"I'm mad at you now." She stuck out her pouty lip.

"Why?" He was laughing again.

"You really wouldn't save me from Ziva?"

"Abs, if Ziva were after you, there's no hope. So no, I wouldn't save you from Ziva. She's trained to hunt people, she's a spy. MCGEE!"

"Boss?" McGee glanced up.

"You busy?" Gibbs asked.

"Just got a hit on Petty Officer Best's cell phone boss. Tracing the call now."

"Good boy. I like it when my team is working hard." Gibbs smiled as he glanced back at Tony and Ziva still having the stare down. "Anyone talk with the girlfriend yet?"

Tony raised his hand as though he were still in school. "She claims she hasn't talked to him in a week boss. But…"

"He's calling her now boss." McGee cut in.

"As I was saying, the last four calls placed to her were from HIS cell phone." Tony finally finished his sentence.

"Ziva." Gibbs pointed at her desk as she moved into place.

"Neighbors saw the Petty Officer outside the house yesterday. He entered her house through the side door and was there about an hour. She was home."

"She lied." Tony shook his head.

"You thought she would tell the truth?" Ziva asked.

"Well with you interrogating her, YES." He sat down at his desk as Ziva smiled.

"Tony?" Abby cut in.

"Yes Abby?" He smiled at her and turned his head slightly to the side.

"Are you going to tell us what that is?"

"Tell you what what is?"

"That?" She pointed to the object.

"Oh, it's a box." He answered.

"And why?" Abby questioned.

"Why is it a box?" Tony was just confusing himself now.

"No, Yes, I mean, what is in the box Tony?"

"I don't know. It was on my desk when I got here." He answered as he picked the box up and shook it gently.

"Tony, you are an ass." Ziva yelled across the room and threw a pen at him.

Dodging the pen, he smiled at her. "Hey, you got that one right, bad aim though."

Tony didn't have time to dodge the incoming stapler and it smacked him hard in the chest.

"Umpf. ZIVA." He cried.

"Stick that in your box Tony." Ziva pointed at him.

"Open it Tony, open it." Abby was clapping her hands and jumping up and down.

Tony set the stapler down and picked the box back up. He opened the end, peered inside and a smile spread across his face.

"What is it Tony?" Abby cried.

Tony glanced around to make sure he had everyone's attention. "Drum roll please?" He frowned when no one responded. "Fine." He sat down in his chair and propped his feet up on the desk.

"Tony. For Gods sake." Ziva yelled.

"What?" He laughed.

"What is it Tony?" Abby was begging now standing beside Tony's desk.

"Who do you love?" Tony asked as he glanced around the room.

"You Tony, you." Abby smiled.

"Ziva?" Tony asked.

"What Tony?"

"Do you love me?"

"Is that supposed to be a trick question?" Ziva asked as she frowned back at him.

"It might be. Choose your words wisely my dear Ziva David."

"Fine. Yes, if it will make you show us what is in the box. YES." She was getting mad again.

"Awe. The love in this room. McGee?" Tony turned to face McGee who just glanced at him and then back at his computer. "Well then, Mcwronganswer. No SNICKERDOODLE COOKIES FOR YOU!!" Tony whipped a Rubbermaid container out of the wrapping and pulled the lid off. He took a deep breath as Abby leaned in to join him.

"Oh those smell good." Abby said.

"They are from my Grandma." Tony beamed with pride.

"Oh I love grandma." Abby said as she grabbed a soft cookie from the box.

"Cookie Ziva?" Tony held the box up for Ziva.

"What is a … snicker doodle?" She questioned.

"You've never had a snicker doodle?" Abby asked amazed.

"I do not believe that I have. Yes I will try one." She took a cookie and examined it.

"You like?" Tony winked at her as she took a bite.

"Boss, new call from the cell phone places Best at the girlfriend's house right now." McGee piped in.

"Let's go get him." Gibbs headed to the elevator.

"Oh yeah." Tony grabbed his bag and headed after him.

Ziva grabbed her gun, ran by Tonys desk and stopped. She glanced at the elevator, looked back at the desk and grabbed the box of cookies. She sprinted through the closing doors just in time.

"Ziva saves the cookies." Tony laughed as Ziva grabbed another cookie.

"Hey Tony?" Gibbs asked.

"Yeah Boss?"

"She touched it." He answered and nodded his head towards Ziva as Tony just shook his head and smiled.


End file.
